New Bride Paranoia

Sometimes in the evenings I see you watching shadows
And staring into hollows of the sky.
And sometimes you tilt your head way back
and watch the magic stars go drifting by.

And your mind belongs to visions not known to me-
Your dreams seem to cling to things that were-
And when you look at me, you're not seeing me at all-
You're seeing her.

Sometimes in the evening you lay quietly beside me
And stare at corners bare of light-
And sometimes I feel that if I touch you,
you'll float off far away just like a kite.

And your mind belongs to visions not known to me-
Your dreams seem to cling to things that were-
And when you touch me, you're not touching me at all-
You're touching her.

Games Of Time

We have no control of the days-
but they have us.
Wrapped tightly into a place,
where simply- we rust.
Where our hair turns gray
and our hearts turn cold-
where we have no control
of growing old.

We have no control of the days-
We think they're far ahead.
Then suddenly, they're behind us
And we are dead.

Hand Me Down World

My friends all wore new-bought fancy shoes
with buckles that would glitter and shine-
But Daddy couldn't afford such things,
so my shoes weren't quite so fine.

First they were Barb's, then they were Jewel's,
Then they were Linda's- THEN they were mine.

My friends all wore beautiful clothes-
The lacy dress-up kind-
But since our family was so large-
we wore what we could find.

First they were Barb's, then they were Jewel's,
Then they were Linda's- THEN they were mine.
But at least I grew up humble-
In awe of the sublime.
And I never regretted having been
The last hand-me-down in line.
But I'm always thankful for something new
Because once there was a time-

First they were Barb's, then they were Jewel's,
Then they were Linda's- THEN they were mine.

Cry

On days like this
I want to crawl into bed-
cover my head
and cry.

I want to bury my head
and pretend I am dead
and shout to the sky-
"It's okay if I cry!"

Why should I hide
what's boiling inside?
Why should I lie
when I just want to cry?

But, I'll stay in bed for awhile-
Then I'll get up and smile.

Because nobody likes
when I cry...

Happier Than Happy

Written May, 1975

Last night I met a gentle man
who opened doors in my life
I never thought existed,
Shut up the wounds of my heart
with the gift of his words-
And he made me smile real smiles
for the first time in a long time.
And I was happier
than happy...

I don't know where I'm going , God.
I'm so confused and hurt inside.
Don't look down on me,
but don't look away.
Give me answers before
I make mistakes.

Last night I met a gentle man.
Why am I so guilty about happiness?
Why am I so afraid of love?
***
(That was 34 years ago.
I married that gentle man.)

Relishing the Moment

Floating in the sunlight
like a fish in some blue sea-
Thinking about our yesterdays-
wondering what's to be-
Hoping that you'll always
continue loving me...

Leaning to the breezes
Like a soaring bird up high-
Making dreams up in my head-
Stars falling from the sky-
Wish I could catch
one silver tip
as it came by...

Relaxing in the moonlight
Like a butterfly set free-
Your gentle, smiling face
is all that I can see.
Just hoping that you'll always
continue loving me...

Wish I Did

Wish I had a strong, wise heart
Like hearts I've often seen-
Then I could reach out and grasp
that distant calling dream.
But if I ever caught that dream
and it's beauty all unfurled-
I would not keep it for myself-
I'd share it with the world.

Wish I knew the kind of music
that the night skies bring-
Wish my tiny, timid heart
was brave enough to sing.
Then I could partake
in the endless cricket tune
And I could dance the night away,
waltzing with the moon.

Haiku Monday

Autumn steals my heart
as leaves the color of fire
fall about my feet.

He's Coming

Here comes Autumn.
He is standing just over the hillside,
waiting for me.
His hair is a nest of leaves-
the color of lemons
and pumpkins
and pomegranates...
He wears a flannel shirt-
a straw hat.
And his cheeks are stained
a sweet Jonathan apple red...
His eyes are the color of midnight
and turquoise
and robin egg blue.
His perfume is sassafras
and cinnamon
and cider...
He brings gifts of wine,
woolens
and wonder.

He smiles at me
and hurries across the hillside.
We'll play and sing and dream-
Until Winter-
-(like a bully)-
comes and chases him away...

Plastic Princess

She lives in a dream house,
She drives a Corvette.
She never gains weight
and she never sweats.
She has a pool and a boat-
A dog and a gym-
Her man's always loved her
and she's always loved him.
She has minks and furs-
bikinis and gowns-
Her makeup is perfect
and she never frowns.
Her shape is perfect
and she's a natural blond.
Sexy and beautiful-
the list goes on.
I'm really not envious,
but I'd give my all-
to have the life
of a Barbie Doll!

Respect Life

I visited the graveyard the other day-
Just to see what Death would say.
And the stories the bodies told
was "Life is more precious than gold."
I chuckled a little, and then they said,
"Oh, child, if you waste your life- you just as well be dead."

CANVAS OF LIFE





















I take my finger and hold it up
And trace the outline of the sky-
Sketch in the wispy pine trees
and the inky clouds up high.
I pretend I am the artist
that created such a sight.
I step back to study the vivid lines
that I adore with such delight.
My humble palette holds no color
as violet as that sky.
What artist paints with such precision?
I admit- it is not I.
No color holds as red a tone
as the autumn maples there.
How exact each fiber of the earth
He has painted with such care!
Every sight that I behold-
He has colored with His hand.
And I could never imitate
the brilliance of this land.
But, when I paint, I like to feel
that the Master guides my eye
And smiles at all that I create
from His workshop in the sky...

Monday Haiku

The autumn leaves fall
One by one, like miracles
the color of fire.

A Long Time Waiting

You can wait for the train
Though it may be late-
Though it may take its time,
you know that the wait
will not be too long
Because you hear it afar-
A rattle- a clicking-
of each metal car.

You can wait for the rain
as it grows in the sky.
But you know it will come
by the clouds drifting by.
And maybe a raindrop
or two may be all-
But you know it will rain-
It's spring, after all.

You can wait for the day
Once night time is here.
Though midnight seems long-
daylight is near.
And you know it will come
though no one has said.
The sun will arise
and come to your bed.

You can wait for love
for days and years-
through smiles and laughter,
pain and tears.
But even when you wait
and waiting is done.
Love isn't here
and may never come.

For love you may wait-
if you can survive
waiting for something
that may never arrive.

Regret

The autumn trees
and gentle breeze
softly spoke my name today.
I ignored the call,
because, after all-
I have no time to play.

Then the bright, warm sun
shouted, "Let's have fun!"
and I ached to join the crew.
But I turned my head
and cried instead,
"I have my work to do!"

Then I heard
A tiny bird
sing, "Come outside with me!"
I said,"I cannot
Because I've got
all this work, you see!"

So they played and played
and I stayed and stayed
quietly at my task.
They begged some more,
so I shut the door
and said, "Don't even ask!"

Night has come
and all the fun
is gone for another day.

I wish I had gone out to play.

Afflicted

The days have all been good to me-
Alas- but not always I to them.
For I change face at every whim
and covet what I cannot see.

One eve I'll curse the length of day-
One morn, I'll cry "How brief!"
and find myself in silent grief
that I have let time just slip away.

I have promises I cannot keep
to the days that have been kind.
Here hails the passing ghost of time
and I, in wasteful shadows, weep.

Bar Star

We went to the bar on Saturday night-
It was loud and crowded and smokey.
The beer was cold- the food was good-
But I was there for the Karaoke!

I know there are those of you who think
that this singing is a little bit hokey-
That you'd never get up on a lighted stage
and belt out some Karaoke.

Cuz...
I didn't think I'd ever be one
to get up and sing Karaoke-
But when they came along with the mic
I jumped up and said-
"Okie-dokie!"

I really can't sing or carry a tune
And most people just wanna choke me-
But I'm not here for the food or the beer-
I'm here
for the Karaoke!

To a Flower

You sit along the roadside
in your yellow petaled dress-
The summer sun beating down on you-
(I'm curious, I confess)-
How such a lovely one as you
could have suffered such demise.
Where did you get the black eyes, Susan?

Fickle

Last night I dreamt I had a balloon
for every person in the world.
At noon, I passed them out
and they gracefully swirled
.... up beyond heaven.

Everyone smiled.
It was a beautiful sight.
Then they went back into their houses
and locked their doors tight.